【诗译】Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep 别站在我墓前哭泣

by 云天

Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep
别站在我墓前哭泣


http://youtu.be/fv9bAma0ft8

http://writewww.com/topic.php?tkey=1283744254&page_no=1&tpno=1&tpc=1&newAtop=1

【注解】网上、微信流传的Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep 的中文诗译,源自译者云天。

以下为云天的新旧三版本:


1.
2015年4月

Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep
Mary Elizabeth Frye

别站在我墓前哭泣
玛丽.伊丽莎白.佛莱
云天 译

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

立我墓前, 请莫哭泣,
我不在那, 我未安息.

I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.

我乘千风, 袅袅吹拂,
我是雪花, 柔柔飘舞.

I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.

我是细雨, 九天飞落,
我是田野, 稻麦婆娑.

I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush.

我是晨吟, 轻柔静谧,
我自匆匆, 风姿飘逸.

Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.

倩鸟盘旋, 翱翔苍穹,
我是星光, 闪烁夜空.

I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.

我是繁花, 灼灼绽放,
我居幽室, 宁寂空荡.

I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.

我是飞鸟, 啁啾鳴唱,
我是尤物, 可爱漂亮.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die.

立我墓前, 请莫哭泣,
我不在那, 我未凋逝.


【注】
微信版与我2010年译本只有以下两处不同。改得不错。但我个人仍倾向于“我未凋逝”。:)

I am in the graceful rush.
我是忙碌--- 我自匆匆 (很好,借用)

I do not die.
我没有死--- 我未逝去。
(网上流行版本还有的用“我不在那,并未离去”,好像多数摘自“21世纪英文报”。
我现在改为“我未凋逝”,“逝/泣”按平水韵同韵。 “去/泣”押新韵。 两者皆可。)




2.
2010年9月译本:

Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep
Mary Elizabeth Frye

别在我墓前哭泣
玛丽.伊丽莎白.佛莱
云天 译

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

立我墓前, 请莫哭泣,
我不在那, 我未安息.

I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.

我乘千风, 袅袅吹拂,
我是雪花, 柔柔飘舞.

I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.

我是细雨, 九天飞落,
我是田野, 稻麦婆娑.

I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush.

我是晨吟, 轻柔静谧,
我是忙碌, 风姿飘逸.

Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.

倩鸟盘旋, 翱翔苍穹,
我是星光, 闪烁夜空.

I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.

我是繁花, 灼灼绽放,
我居幽室, 宁寂空荡.

I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.

我是飞鸟, 啁啾鳴唱,
我是尤物, 可爱漂亮.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die.

立我墓前, 请莫哭泣,
我不在那, 我没有死.

【注】
这首诗(歌)译曾在闲地雨田悼念先生线上受到毛毛爸/唯一指点鼓励
"婆娑"一词出自毛毛爸.


3.
2009-6-24 的旧译:

http://www.smallstation.net/portal.php?mod=view&aid=1221

Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep
别在我墓前哭泣
云天译

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

请别伫立在我墓前哭泣,
我不在那里, 我未安息.

I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.

我乘千风, 袅袅吹拂,
我是雪花, 柔柔飘落.

I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.

我是雨丝, 曼曼飞舞,
我是麦田, 片片成熟.

I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush.

我是低吟, 清晨静谧,
我是忙碌, 风姿飘逸.

Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.

倩鸟盘旋, 翱翔苍穹,
我是星光, 闪耀夜空.

I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.

我是花朵, 灼灼绽放,
我立幽室, 寂静空荡.

I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.

我是飞鸟, 啁啾鳴唱,
我是尤物, 可爱漂亮.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die.

请别伫立在我墓前哭泣,
我不在那里, 我没有死.

【注】
把韩信, 哦, 韩欣贴的诗匆匆一译.
当我老了, 我愿在小径上走啊走啊, 直到我倒下, 随风而去.....




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2015-04-17 10:06:46